Feeling Safe to Heal: How Polyvagal Theory Helps Us Understand the Nervous System

Have you ever felt like your body was reacting before your brain had a chance to catch up? Maybe your heart races during a difficult conversation, or you suddenly shut down when something overwhelms you. These experiences aren’t just in your head—they’re happening in your nervous system. And Polyvagal Theory helps us understand why.

Developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, Polyvagal Theory explains how our nervous system constantly scans the environment for cues of safety or danger, a process called neuroception. Based on what it detects, your body shifts into different states to keep you safe—even if the threat isn’t life-or-death.

Here are the three main states Polyvagal Theory describes:

Ventral Vagal (Safe & Social):
This is the calm, connected state where we feel grounded, curious, and open to others. In this state, we can think clearly, communicate well, and process emotions. It's where real healing happens.

Sympathetic (Fight or Flight):
When we sense danger, our nervous system shifts into action mode. You might feel anxious, angry, restless, or hyper-alert. This state is built for survival—but it’s hard to rest or relate to others when you're here.

Dorsal Vagal (Shutdown or Freeze):
If fight or flight isn’t an option, your system may go into shutdown. You might feel numb, disconnected, hopeless, or paralyzed. This too is a survival response, but it can feel like depression or dissociation.

At Crosby DBT of Seattle, I integrate Polyvagal Theory into how I understand and treat complex trauma, emotion dysregulation, and nervous system overwhelm. I help clients build awareness of their body’s cues, develop tools to return to safety, and cultivate the capacity to stay connected—even during hard moments.

Understanding your nervous system isn't about “fixing” yourself—it’s about learning to listen to your body with compassion and giving it the support it needs to come back into balance.

If you're ready to feel more connected, calm, and in control, I’d love to support you.
Let’s build your life worth living—one breath, one step, one safe moment at a time.

Learn more or get in touch: www.crosbydbt.com